The Mistah gave me Cook Wise for Christmas and no sooner had we cleaned up the wrapping paper and bows than I cracked it open and started reading. And I immediately felt like I was back in college, struggling to understand Man In A Chemical World which was basically Science For Dummies Who Need An Easy Science Credit For Graduation. I don’t know why or how but I’m starting to suspect that my ability to learn new information has abandoned me. It’s a good thing I already have that college degree because if I can’t understand a book about food science specifically written for non-scientists, I sure as hell wouldn’t make it through Stat 331 or 332. Nevermind that I had to retake 331 or that none of what I was taught in those classes has ever been used in my life outside of that classroom.
So I’m working through Cook Wise and I notice that while I feel like I need Cliff Notes for the chapters, the recipes make perfect sense. Having never taken an in-depth Science course in college, I don’t know if I would have been any better in the lab than the lecture. But I’m hoping that will be the case with Cook Wise 101. Actually, I’m hoping that at some point the light bulb in my head will turn back on and the food science part will start making sense too. But into the kitchen we go to try and make the Raised Waffles. And despite understanding the recipe, I still fail the exam. It’s like Man In A Chemical World all over again.
Even after rereading the section many times, I can’t explain why the inside of my Raised Waffles don’t cook. I get the outside crisp but the inside is gummy and raw. After four attempts where I vary the temperature of the waffle iron, cooking time, and amount of batter, I concede and throw some frozen waffles in the toaster. My friends, defeat tastes like a buttered Trader Joe’s Blueberry Waffle.
Much like I retook Stat 331 (only because I absolutely had to in order to get that damn degree), I’m going to retake this exam from Cook Wise 101. My kitchen gpa needs a Pass to offset this Fail.