Deviled Egg Spread

In a perfect world, we would have had the deviled egg spread conversation right before Easter.  Because really, what happens to all those eggs that have been dyed and decorated after the egg hunt is over?  I wish someone could give me a statistic about egg sales in the two weeks before Easter to gauge the order of magnitude of how many people have hard boiled eggs giving them the stink eye from their fridge in the days after Peter Cottontail has gone hippity hoppity down the lane.

In my not-so-perfect world, this jem has been in the pile to tell you about for months.  That’s horrible, I know.  It’s not that I’ve been hoarding this information.  On the contrary, I gladly shared it with our dinner guests @Yinzerella (Emily) and her fella (Cleve) who were unknowingly my official testers for this dish.  After the deviled egg spread got lots of yummy noises and thumbs up as the hors d’oeuvres du jour for that dinner party, I intended to tell you about them right away.

But my brain, post 40, ain’t what it used to be.  I’ve been distracted by the entire first season of Ink Master, a few cringe worthy episodes of Dance Moms, the return of both Mad Men and The Killing, weekly visits to the yoga studio, and some evenings and weekends working with the ladies of Phi Mu.  There’s just not enough space in my head to keep everything straight….and it appears that deviled egg spread took the hit in this instance.

Let me throw an aside out there to you, the reader.  If you happen to fall in that demographic that makes advertisers drool, ie 18-24 or 25-34, you may be (arrogantly) thinking that this kind of thing will never happen to you.  You think that youthful perfection will always be on your side.  You can not image a day when you will be betrayed by your brain mid sentence when words just disappear or you spend 15 minutes searching for the car keys only to realize they have been in your hand the entire time.  In your mind, hell will freeze over before you will look in the mirror at the end of the day and realize that some crazy hair has been sticking out of your chin for christ knows how long (and nobody bothered to tell you).  Allow me to break the news to you gently….this IS your future.  Enjoy the youthful blessings of perfect recall, flawless complexion, and high metabolism.  Because one day, you will wake up and realize that you’ve become THAT person….the one that you mocked back in your younger days.

I say this from my own stroll down this path…Karma is a bitch and her memory is long.

Now that my public service announcement is over, let’s get back to deviled egg spread.  Because I may have missed my opportunity to get you on board with deviled egg spread in time for Easter, but we’re moving headlong into prime brunch, picnic, and potluck season.  Look at the calendar…Mother’s Day, Memorial Day, 4th of July and Labor Day are all lined up.  These occasions were made for deviled egg spread.  Whether you make bitty finger sandwiches to take to brunch or stand in the middle of your kitchen and enjoy a a slice of Wonder bread slathered with the spread, deviled egg spread is the right answer.

It is spring weekends served on toast points and summer holiday licked from the back of a spoon.  In an ever changing world, it is one of my constants.

Deviled Egg Spread

BAH Note:  I used small biscuit cutters to get those pita rounds I used to serve the egg spread.  There were dainty and polite for our company but truth be told, I would have happily used my hands to shove this spread in my mouth.

• 6 large eggs
• 1 tablespoon white vinegar
• 1/2 cup mayonnaise
• 1 1/2 teaspoons yellow mustard

Place the eggs in pot large enough so that you can cover the eggs completely with water with about an inch or so of water above the eggs.  Add the vinegar to the pot and cook over high heat until you reach a boil.  Once the water boils, cover your pot and take it off the heat.  Allow the eggs to sit in the water for 15 minutes before you carefully remove the eggs from the hot water and cool them in a bowl of cold water.

Once the eggs are cool, pour off the water.  Peel the shells and cut the eggs in half.  Roughly chop half of the eggs.  Place the remaining half of the eggs in the food processor.  Add the mustard and mayo and pulse until smooth.  Transfer the smooth egg mixture to a bowl, stir in the chopped eggs, and season to taste with salt and pepper.

{printable recipe}