I need to get something off my chest….I thought we were friends, but I’m starting to have my doubts. Sure I might disappear from this space for looooong stretches of time without warning. And I might be just a touch more forgetful about asking how you’ve been and how the world is treating you. And my awareness of what is going on around me may have hit an all time low. But for the life of me I can’t understand why you would do this to me.
For the love of all that is good and right, why didn’t you tell me that 3 year olds are such big jerks?
What’s that? You say that you don’t have firsthand knowledge of life with a 3 year old? Ok, well then I can’t hold that against you. Please accept my apology for being all crankypants with you.
But what about the rest of you? The parents. The people who have already experienced the tempest that is a 3 year old. How could you have failed to at least mention that there might be a chance that my child may, at times, become a total jerk by her 3rd birthday?
That’s just how 3 year olds are, you say? They turn from Dr. Jekyll into Mr. Hyde without warning? Yeah I’ve noticed that, thanks. It would have been helpful to have been given that nugget of information ahead of time.
So for anyone out there who may, at some point, be responsible for a child, allow me to tell you what everyone else already knows but isn’t saying…Life with a 3 year old is like Clash of the Titans. Every. Single. Day. There’s no way to avoid it. There’s little you can do to prepare for it other than to know that it’s steaming towards you like a locomotive. One day, without warning, that train will arrive. And when it does, you will most likely be standing in the middle of tracks and get completely steam rolled.
I suggest you pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and start all over again. And maybe have a cocktail once you get The Kraken tucked into bed.
Frozen Cherry Lemonade
Inspired by Shutterbean’s Boozy Cherry Slushies
BAH Note: The bourbon is 100% optional. But after a long day with a 3 year old, you might want to exercise that option. I whip this up in my Vitamix so breaking down the ice cubes and getting a good slushy consistency isn’t hard. If your mixer needs a little help, try using crushed ice if you have that option on your ice maker, or place whole ice cubes in a plastic bag and whack them with a rolling pin to break them up.
- 1/2 cup cherry syrup (recipe below)
- 1 1/2 cup lemonade (homemade is fine but I got mine at the store)
- 1/4 cup bourbon (optional)
- 4 cups ice
Combine cherry syrup, lemonade, and bourbon (if using) in your blender and give it a good whirl. Add the ice and blend until you get a slushy consistency. Don’t be alarmed if the drink separates a bit in your glass as it melts.
Shutterbean’s Cherry Syrup
- 1 pound sweet cherries, pitted
- 1 cup sugar
- 1 1 /2 cups water
- juice and zest of 2 limes
Cook the cherries, sugar, water, and lime juice and zest in a saucepan over medium heat for about 10 minutes or until the cherries burst and the liquid starts to simmer. Remove from the heat and let cool for 20 minutes before straining the liquid through a mesh sieve into a container for storage in the fridge.